 We’re down to the final page of the ’06 calendar. What has this year been about for you? Could you sum it up with a theme? Did you create the results you imagined for yourself as the year began? What were the biggest lessons it brought? What amazing things happened that you couldn’t possibly have foreseen? What life-changing epiphanies or realizations did you have? I’d love to hear about your highlights; what it is that you’ll remember 2006 for.
Before we can look at where we’re going, it’s key to take note of where we are. Logic tells us that in order to have specific directions to point ‘B’, we know exactly where point ‘A’ is. Take the time to acknowledge and celebrate what we’ve accomplished. Forgive ourselves where we missed. Recognize the lessons we’ve learned. Check in with what’s truly most important for us. Once that’s done, we can start to think about the year ahead.
I’ve had such an amazing time the past few weeks holding the ‘Creating Wow’ goal setting workshops. The highlight of the workshops, for me, was all the wisdom that participants were willing to share with one another. The overwhelming message of the event? The more we worked to clarify our desires, the easier it was to begin making them happen. The act of having to write them down required us to really articulate what we wanted. Then, and only then, we could start to plot our course. I was chatting with my writer friend Wally Hild the other day (From Hodgkin’s to Ironman, Through the Valley of the Shadow) about how writing is, ultimately, ‘brain clarification’. It’s much more evident to us when we’re being vague, leaving thoughts and sentences unfinished, when it’s staring up at us from a piece of paper.
The other illuminating moment I witnessed in this month’s workshops was when everyone took a look at the roadblocks that have kept them from realizing their dreams to date. Was it a lack of knowledge? A skill set that needs to be learned? A limiting assumption? Fear? Shining a flashlight in those dark corners takes away the power of whatever it is that’s blocking us. Once these things are down on paper, they’re so much easier to overcome, to ask for help with, and to get into perspective.
When I look back on the year just passed, I see so many things to celebrate and be grateful for. I look at the community of people around me; friends, family, clients, fellow members of different groups and associations. I see all the results we set out to realize and how, by enrolling each other in our vision, we were able to make so much of it happen. My hat’s off to you for all you accomplished this past year, and I’m excited to see what we can all create in the year to come.
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 Dear Coach,
To move ahead in my career, I need to get a grip on speaking in public. What can I do to shake my fears, stop turning bright red and having my heart pound in my throat every time I get the opportunity to present to a group? Signed – Tongue Tied
Dear Tied,
You’re not alone. For many people (40%, according to studies) fear of public speaking outranks fear of anything, including death! You are, however, missing out on important opportunities. Let’s take a look at a few strategies to get you the positive attention you deserve.
First of all, realize that everyone, including experienced performers, comics and politicians, gets that rush before they have to speak in public. It’s adrenaline, it’s natural, and without it your forbearers would have been eaten by a lion millennia ago and you wouldn’t be here having this anxiety today! That said, many people learn to control that fear, even use it to their advantage. It’s called “getting the butterflies to fly in formation”.
Here’s how:
1. First, get your ‘talking points’ in order. Know the few topics you’re most likely going to be asked to speak about, write out the key points you’d like to make on each, and practice. When I got my first sales job, my Mother sat through endless presentations until I had it down comfortably. She was a trooper, and showed renewed interest in buying a Vacation Lifestyle every time! Thanks Mom.
2. Next, visualize yourself delivering your speech successfully. Keep the pictures in your mind positive; don’t waste time creating a blueprint for failure by imagining the worst. Thoughts are powerful. You are programming yourself here. Be good to yourself; be a star!
3. Leave time for laughter and understanding. When you’ve said something important or funny give your audience a moment to digest it before continuing. People repeat what you’ve said in their heads before they respond. These pauses also give you time to gather your thoughts. Pauses are good.
4. Breathing is also good. Take a few deep ones before you start, and anytime you start to feel like you’re rushing. The oxygen will help your brain work to capacity while all that adrenaline is floating around in there.
5. Realize that any blank stares are because they are processing your words. You’re doing fine. No-one can tell that you’re nervous. Really.
The best advice I can give you, Tied, is get thee to a Toastmasters Club. There are two in Penticton and several in Kelowna. You’ll learn all these skills and many, many more.
Carol McQuaid is a Penticton based Business and Personal Success Coach. She can be reached at www.cmqcoaching.com
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 “Oh, The Places You’ll Go!” by Dr. Seuss
If you don’t already have this book, it’s a must buy. I’ve used it to read my son to sleep, to train sales people (when you’re in a slump, you’re not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done!), during vision and goal setting sessions (with brains in your head and feet in your shoes, you can take yourself any direction you choose!) and to help myself get back to basics when I start to let life get complicated. Dr. Seuss is, of course, a master of insight and has such a great way of articulating it. Of all his books, this one wins the Carol McQuaid ‘Most Relevant In The Real World’ Award. This is a great gift, if you happen to be in the gift giving mode at the moment. It also belongs in everyone’s home and office library. While I may have received some strange looks when I walked in to present to a room full of grown-up professionals with this tucked under my arm, it has a way of reaching every audience with its message. And… when you don’t feel like reading, the illustrations are entertaining all on their own! Enjoy.
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